Matix

When you wear the Matix Men's Super-Gusto Military Party Shorts, be prepared for all-nighters and non-stop raging. These board shorts feature double beverage holster pockets so you can load up on your favorite frothy beverage.

If they had skateboarding back in the day, you know old papi would have worn the Matix Men's Marconi Shorts. These lightweight shorts feature an old-man-esque checked pattern that gives you a foppish look the chicks'll dig.